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2024.10.31 🌧️

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Last blog of the month. It's cold as fuck and there's donuts in the breakroom. I haven't watched many horror movies this month (only five), so here's my spooktober review:

! ! ! SPOILERS (SORT OF) ! ! !

1. Pandorum (2009)

This has been on my watchlist for over a decade. I've been hesitant due to its icky spastic 2000s-era Saw-giving trailers, but Pandorum has a cult following and it's adjacent to other scifi horrors of my liking (e.g. Dead Space, Event Horizon).

After a brief exposition dump about how Earth's resources are fucked and spaceship Elysium is sent carrying 60,000 people on a 123-year trip to colonize planet Tanis, we're introduced to Corporal Bower (Ben Foster), who is aruptly ejected from hypersleep.

I've seen hypersleep awakenings depicted in Alien and Event Horizon, usually accompanied by nausea and mild confusion; Pandorum's is by far the most metal. Bower is visibly shocked and in pain, having to rip Matrix-like tubes out of his body, all while shaking and covered in goo.

Bower finds Lieutenant Payton (Dennis Quaid), and both realize they've been improperly awoken due to the ship's unstable reactor. Due to their premature ejection from hypersleep, they both have partial amnesia and may suffer a space-related psychosis called pandorum, hence the titular title.

A good chunk of the movie is spent with Bower as he investigates the ship while Payton acts as overwatch from a computer. The production can be spotty, but overall the cold dark metal aesthetic of the ship is mostly believable, conveying a sense of nervous claustrophobia.

Good blogs use Alamy photos

Ben Foster does a great job as the protagonist, seeming genuinely concerned for the safety of the ship's crew, becoming increasingly punished as things get worse throughout the movie. And by worse I mean when humonoid cannibals show up and start violently murdering and eating people.

What the fuck

I wanted to like Pandorum more, but there's too many scenes that drag the 108-minute runtime. The tone and pacing are uneven, teetering between serious scifi mystery to full-blown SYFY channel splatter shlock horror (the latter of which I have no problem with).

As bloated as the movie is (like this review), the action was mostly serviceble and I did enjoy the cannibal gore scenes. However, Pandorum is mostly forgettable, so I'm giving it two bags of popcorn. 🍿🍿

2. A History of Violence (2005)

This was a Cronenberg re-watch that's been on my mind since my first viewing in high school, possibly college. Viggo Mortensen plays Tom Stall, a small town diner owner with a wife and kids. Two spree killers attempt to rob his diner, but Stall valiantly defends his patrons and disposes of the criminals.

News of the incident makes Stall a local celebrity, and he briefly appears on televised news. Soon after, a mobster from Philidelphia shows up to the diner (Ed Harris), claiming to know Stall as a different person entirely. The mobster and his goons begin stalking Stall, and hilarity ensues.

I love simple premises like this. I also romanticize cozy small town living (see my last blog about life in the suburbs), or at least the portrayal of it in media. Cronenberg's early work contain more scifi body horror, but A History Of Violence's story stays a bit more grounded, giving it a grittier feel.

The cast playing Stall's family do a great job, particularly the wife Edie (Maria Bello), who shows impressive emotional range as the events of the movie escalate. The son, Jack (Ashton Holmes), has his own subplot involving high school bullies. This parallels his father's actions and might have a little something to say about the cycle of generational violence, but its subtle enough that it doesn't detract from the main story.

You can Blu-Ray that shit

There's also a couple extra saucy sex scenes, so add a bonus bucket of popcorn if you're into that. Running at a tight 96 minutes with little to no scenes wasted, I give this family-drama driven and occasionally gorey movie four bags of popcorn and a cup of coffee. πŸΏπŸΏπŸΏπŸΏβ˜•

3. The Substance (2024)

I already talked about this in my [2024.10.21] blog, so I'll keep this one brief. It's fucking NUTS. Hyper stylish and gross. Serves all the cvnt and some. Cronenberg, Stuart Gordan, and all the body horror gods should be proud.

Demi Moore plays an aging fitness star ("Elisabeth Sparkle") who gets let go by her producer- oh look who it is again, Dennis Quaid (hilariously named "Harvey"). Shortly after, Sparkle comes across a black market de-aging drug called The Substance.

POV Dennis Quaid

I'm gonna stop here because this is one of those 'dive in blind' type of movies, because it's just so particurarly absurd and obscene. It's also extremely satirical, and despite what some critics might say, shouldn't be taken too seriously. It's a dark comedy body horror and I'll leave it at that. Four bags of popcorn and a bad bitch.

πŸΏπŸΏπŸΏπŸΏπŸ’…

4. Terrifier 3 (2024)

I also talked about this in a previous blog. Rarely (maybe never) can I say the third movie in a series is its best. Terrifier has done an unprecented job of carving out its gore slasher audience and pushing us through the grinder. The practical effects and legitimately impressive, the soundtrack is awesome, and clearly a lot of heart and soul and bones and blood went into Terrifier 3. Either watch it or don't, but it's five knives of popcorn from me.

πŸ”ͺπŸ”ͺπŸ”ͺπŸ”ͺπŸ”ͺ

5. Strange Darling (2023)

Thanks to RedLetterMedia's Half in the Bag: The Kyle Gallner Triple Feature Spectacular! video, which led to watching Dinner In America, I find myself overtly stanning and simping Kyle Gallner.

Who was once the awkward emo kid in Jennifer's Body, is now a hunky badass (why the fuck am I writing this). Anyways, Strange Darling is a rollercoaster romance thriller told in six chapters. Like The Substance, I'd avoid spoilers if you can. It carries a lot of strength in its plot delivery.

I've seen people compare this movie to Tarantino and David Lynch, and it's certainly stylized in ways that are reminiscent of their work, but I'd say Strange Darling has an indenitity of its own, more inspired than derivative. The performance of Willa Fitzgerald's character carries a lot of weight, and Gallner does a great job as well, simping notwithstanding.

If you like fiery romance crime thrillers, check this one out. I give it four bags, almost a perfect score if it weren't for one particular very drawn out scene with an awful song choice that made me cringe. 🍿🍿🍿🍿

And that's it from me. This took way longer than I anticipated, and you're an absolute champ if you read all that. I was going to talk about other stuff, but I'll save it for later.

Happy Halloween! πŸ‘»

2024.10.30 🌧️

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Wicked back pain today. I suspect I have a herniated disc that's pressing on a nerve. Made the mistake of foam rolling to pop my spine, which made it worse. I'll stick to rolling glutes and opening the hips. β€οΈβ€πŸ©Ή

Watched Conner O'Malley's Rap World last night, a camcorder mockumentary following three friends in their nightlong attempt to record a rap album.

Rap World is a very specific look at what it was like to be a middle-class degenerate in the late 2000s American suburbs. Smoking weed in your friend's mom's basement, getting pranked in the McDonald's drive-thru, crashing a house party and fighting the owner- yeah, that takes me back.

My familiarity with Rap World's setting nearly gave me a panic attack. Every detail from the early digital camcorder aesthetic to the characters' clothing and personalities are eerily reminiscent of my upbringing in 'suburban hell'.

There wasn't much to do outside of smoking cigarettes outside Chevron or getting drunk in the garage. The munedaneness of daily life is strangely isolating, which can make people repressed and stir-crazy. This is compounded by the monotony of surburban planning and architecture, which is often soulless.

While most of O'Malley's YouTube content is completely unhinged, Rap World is oddly nostalgic and legitimately authentic. I laughed really fucking hard throughout its hourlong runtime, and it even played at Hollywood Theatre.

Some of its humor might be lost on city or rural kids, maybe having overlapping qualities with small town folks, but it can still be appreciated as a time capsule of suburban American culture. I'd loosely lump Rap World with films like Donnie Darko and Greener Grass. Now, time to hit the Micky D's drive-thru. I just hope the McFlurry machine ain't broken.

"Some of the best nights of my life were being had in parkings lots."

2024.10.29 ☁️

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I've officially entered my ghoul phase in life. Years of alcohol and cigarette abuse (among other things) combined with sleep deprivation and eating Taco Bell like a goblin have blessed me with horrendous eye bags and a body built like a high school desk. I'm a walking creepypasta.


Β‘Yo quiero Taco Bell!

Stayed up late playing cage matches and war games in WWE 2k24. There's an impressive amount of modes and customization in the game, plus a decent roster of wrestlers.

My only gripes are the dogshit tank controls, janky targeting, and an unskippable pop song that makes me want to dive into a moving train.


^I hate this

Cult Leader is a hardcore punk band from Salt Lake City, Utah. They were formerly Gaza, a chaotic metalcore band I found using the "grindcore" tag on MySpace's search engine.

For years, Gaza was my favorite band. Their dark themes, heavy sludgy mathcore riffs, unconventional compositions, erratic drumming and scary vocals- all very appealing for a depressed edgy teenager.


I Don't Care Where I Go When I Die (2006)

Gaza came to an unfortunate end, as allegations were posted against their vocalist, combined with tensions with other members. The band kicked him out and reformed as Cult Leader.

While I still listened to Gaza years after their reformation (often criticizing Cult Leader's sound for being watered down from their previous work), the allegation story left a bad taste that slowly eroded my emotional connection to their music.

As time went on, my tastes changed and I stopped listening to Gaza entirely.


Nothing For Us Here (2014)

This is (unfortunately) a common story. There's endless discourse about separating artists from art, and how forgiving their audiences should be.

The most egregious example (imo) being the legacy of the king of pop, who many people believe was a child predator, had multiple allegations against him, including a case from 1993 that was settled out of court for $23 mil.

Despite the allegations, stories, and documentaries, MJ's music is still hugely popular. There's even a recent Netflix-produced short film for "Thriller", which was ironically made for children. Baffling.


South Park S8E6: The Jeffersons

People who form emotional bonds to art usually don't peak behind the curtain. Should I not watch Rosemary's Baby because the director is a creep? Should I not eat Subway because their biggest spokesman was arrested for CP? Should I not use my iPhone because Foxconn workers throw themselves out of buildings, or its computer chips use colbolt mined by Congolese children?

I'm going off the rails, but you get the point. None of this matters anyways- I'm not a moralist or activist. Just a dumbass with a blog. ✨

P.S. Some additional thoughts:


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2024.10.28 β›…

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Spent the weekend in Manzanita in an oversized 4-bedroom house, only to be occupied by two people and a cat. The rental was a hookup as a result for driving my friend's mom to the coast.

My creative spirit from the last couple weeks has dropped off significantly. I'm a little relieved to have a slow week. Still no plans for Halloween.

Not much else to say. Got my TV's eARC (enhanced audio returnal channel) HDMI port to work with my soundbar. Replaying Far Cry 5 and got WWE 2k24 to play doubles with the wife.

Will likely start Twin Peaks season 3 this week. No upcoming movies on my radar, other than Robert Eggers' Nosferatu, which releases on Christmas Day.

Listened to Senza during the drive home, a Portland screamo band. I've seen them a few times in the city, including the Hoan Kiem show with iheardyourlaugh.

They're incredible to see live, notably omitting the use of microphones, yet somehow all three members scream loud and high-pitched enough to be heard over their instruments.

Senza's new EP, Celestial Body, is set to release for streaming and vinyl this Friday.


2024.10.23 πŸŽ„

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Christmas came early in the form Terrifier 3, the gross third installment in the newly popular killer clown series that's outperforming Joker 2. It's nutty how quickly Art became a recognizable horror figure this late in the game.

Terrifier was a sleeper hit that gained a cult following, Terrifier 2 was a crowdfunded success that went viral for its infamous bedroom scene, and now its holiday themed threequel just banked $44.9 mil on a $2 mil budget.

The opening scene felt very Black Christmas (1974) in look and tone. Paul Wiley coats the film with dark psychedellic synth tracks. The sound design is also terrific. I haven't heard a chainsaw so loud since I watched The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974) at Hollywood Theatre.

Art is the face of the Terrifier franchise, but its returning character Victoria Hayes takes center stage as her putrid face and macabre humor perfectly matches Art's freak while they commit horrific acts of violence. Expect to see Art & Victoria cosplay couples this Halloween. <3

Abort Mastication is a death metal grindcore band from Tokyo, Japan. Their drummer Kyosuke also plays for No One Knows What The Dead Think.

I want to share Paul Wiley's score for Terrifier 3, but it doesn't look available yet. There's a short film music video featuring heavy metal band Ice Nine Kills (clearly a play on Nine Inch Nails), as added promotion for the movie.

P.S. There's a Terrifier The ARTcade Game being developed by Relevo.

2024.10.22 πŸŽ‚

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Slept for two hours. Insomnia is becoming a legitimate problem. Need to work on stress management. Incentive to abstain from booze and flower, as they both disrupt REM sleep. I've had a string of stress nightmares this year, one resulting in sleep paralysis that simulated a shadow demon sitting on my chest, paralyzing my body so I was unable to move or look at it directly.

Uzumaki released its fourth and final episode, which caught me offguard, as I didn't realize I was watching the finale. The conclusion is bittersweet, as I wanted to "hang out" in the Uzumakiverse for at least ten episodes. It's been so long since I've read the source material, so I'm not sure if any plots were skipped over, but Junji Ito mangas are generally fast reads.

My dismay is in part due to waiting five years for the show's release (due to pandemic production complications), and my overanticipation hindered the viewing experience. Quality issues aside, I like what the creators delivered overall: A creepy, gross, disturbing, uncanny horror anime, faithful to Ito's black and white artstyle, with a memorably haunting soundtrack.

Speaking of shows that ended earlier than I anticipated, I also wrongly assumed Tim Dillon's special, This Is Your Country, would be a longer series. Inspired by 90s trash television like The Jerry Springer Show, Dillon talks to a variety of guests to confront oddball issues, ranging from a zoomer who wants his cousin to stop bullying men on OnlyFans, to a crypto bro revealing a $200k loss to his pregnant wife.

The topics are hit or miss with middling degrees of intrigue, and questionable authenticity from the guests. The strong point of the special comes from Dillon, who roasts the living shit out of his audience members, reminding us how strong his crowdwork is.

My biggest gripe is that no one throws hands, and from the lack of visible security guards, there were likely legal limits enforced by Netflix that prevented physical altercations from erupting. Not like the good ol' days.


Hello, pigs!

Today's song, "You're Not Here" (featured in Silent Hill 3), was composed by Akira Yamaoka, a Japanese composer for the Silent Hill series, the Silent Hill films, and is now the sound director for Grasshopper Manufacture.


The vocals are performed by Mary Elizabeth McGlynn, an American voice actor and singer with notable roles including Major (Ghost In The Shell: Stand Alone Complex), Julia (Cowboy Bebop), and Nina Williams from Tekken.

I've actually seen her do a panel at Kawaii Kon, an anime expo at the Honolulu Convention Center. She was with her husband, Spike Spieg- I mean Steve Blum, who is also a voice actor (he's TOM from Toonami).

Between SH3, Bebop, Champloo, Tekken, and many others, McGlynn and Blum are a power couple within the anime/video game VA space. I've likely heard their voices during my upbringing more times than I realized.


Source: Giaurlyn <3

2024.10.21 🍺️

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I'm extra salty it's Monday because there's cool Garfield shirts at Target, but none of them are my size.

We watched The Substance, followed by chicken wings and Terra at 1st Street Pocha. Things have slowed down since the funeral, yet the holiday drivers are speeding up. (I passed a nice 8-car pileup on the way to work).

Lazer Bullet is a fast hardcore punk band from Portland, Oregon. Like Alienator, I've watched them both play at Black Water.

P.S. The Substance is absolutely bonkers. Body horror has been making a comeback with recent films like Evil Dead Rise, Possessor, Crimes of the Future (anything by the Cronenbergs). A24 and NEON have been dueling to produce the grossest weirdest shlockhouse films while the freaks and I lap it up. French director Coralie Fargeat has a style I describe as, 'likes to drag her audience through glass', as I had seen in her previous movie Revenge.

While I wish The Substance were trimmed down for time (pacing is my biggest issue with modern movies), the film's dark humor, absurdity, and outrageously violent payoff is 100% worth viewing.


Pump it up!

2024.10.18 🌧️

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Another busy Friday; spent the morning speedrunning data entry. Neck is stiff as hell. The northwest cold is settling in. Stayed up late making website edits. Forgot how addicting HTML can be. I'm disillusioned with mainstream social media, so playing neocities has been a fresh of breath air. (Thanks, Randy Moon). I had multiple Xanga pages and MySpace way back when, yet somehow geocities escaped me.

I've not had a creative outlet in over 2 years, since I quit playing music. However, a few weeks ago my clever wife tricked me into a pawn shop that sells guns and guitars. If that wasn't cool enough, the first axe I clocked was a black solid body Ibanez RG, which happens to be my favorite line of guitars (I have a mahogany 6-string and black 7-string RG back home).


Source: Greener Grass

So between the involved coding of my blog and shredding nonsense riffs out of a shitty 15-watt Marshall, it appears my creative spirit is starting to reflourish. I suppose that's good for my soul.

Chat Pile is a gnarly sludge metal band from Oklahoma City. The vocalist has an unusual singing style (reminds me of Daughters), their lyrics are depressing, and their influences are even more depressing-er. I heard they're touring Oregon soon.

"...All the blood
And the fuckin' sound, man
You look at their eyes..."

"...And the screaming
More screaming than you'd think
There's more screaming than you'd think

Everyone's head rings here
Everyone's head rings here
You never forget their eyes..."

"...Hammers and grease."

2024.10.17 πŸ‚

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The leaves are turning yellow for autumn. We're met again by a timid buck in the middle of the trail. He stares at us for a moment, then saunters off into the forest while two joggers run by.

Slide 1
Slide 2
Slide 3

After devouring lamb arabi and cold beer, we subject ourselves to the nightmare of Uzumaki episode 3. The janky animation felt purposeful and creepy, giving its characters an uncanny, disturbing quality. Without spoiling too much, all I can say is I hate hand crank drills now.



My Bellingham bro turned Long Beach boy just dropped a neocrust punk skramz 4-track EP called mmxxiv by recvrse, with his homie from Los Angeles. This made for pleasant listening while stoned in the shower:


Unrelated, the ads for KILL KNIGHT look incredible. As a RUINER fan (brutal Akira-inspired cyberpunk top-down action shooter), KILL KNIGHT might be the cosmic hellshadow of that game, reminiscent of Mandy.

2024.10.16

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I almost ate fucking shit on the freeway after a line of cars stopped abruptly. I swerved, braked, honked, hit the emergency lights and skirted on the sweet Oregon rain. Ironically, Alienator's "Buried Alive" was playing off their album Time To Die. The punk gods have a sick sense of humor.

Alienator is a ripping hardcore fast-punk band from Milwaukee, Wisconsin. I seen them play at Black Water, a vegan restaurant & bar in Portland. Our Raniers got crushed and I got decked in the back of the head. So, fun show. They're on some label or punk collective called Unlawful Assembly.

2024.10.15

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Thinking of i heard your laugh from outside and thought it was a small wounded dog, a screamo band from Portland. I've met the singer a couple times. Chill dude. They've since disbanded and took down their posts. I last saw them open for Senza at Hoan Kiem in northeast. I shot the singer and got elbowed in the neck. Funnily, he thanked me after for pitting.

but i cant move on
just wait for something
break my self down
a face that feels nothing
i look for no one
not once for me
within this being
bleak
i look for no one
it all stays the same
complacent within me
knowing what’s left

something is missing
a virtue through blood
hide in the darkness
feelings worth felt

i can’t hang on
clinging to trains
aiming at stars
i have but nothing
no one
i threw it all away
nothing
no one
i have myself to blame

2024.10.14

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Starting the week with Agents of Abhorrence, a three-piece grindcore band from Melbourne, Australia. Their socials look inactive, but I'll link their Facebook and Bandcamp for anyone who's interested.

Rewatched A History of Violence last night (David Cronenberg). Simple premise, but well-executed. I like small town vibes, diners, and shotgun blasts through the sternum.

I put in an offer for a maple foot couch at the consignment store. It's a bigger, firmer version of my current couch, and I'm certain it'll be healthier for my back long-term.

My algo is convinced I have neuropathy (nerve damage), and keeps shilling mushroom coffee. I like the product, but I have to be cautious against self-fulfilling prophecies of pain diagnoses.


2024.10.12 (evening)

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Walked through the forest and was met by three deer: two does and a buck with antlers. The male was shy; he did not want to be seen.

We watched ducks swim in a pond. Later, the Ducks played on several widescreen TVs at McMenamins. I ate a plate of steaming hot cajun tator tots, three sliders, and a flight of beers.

Show Me The Body is a post-hardcore band from New York City. A friend showed me this band during my recent trip to Hawaii, for the death of my father-in-law. RIP.

dice
pond

2024.10.12 (morning)

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Last night I watched Uzumaki episode 2. It was chock-full of spookies, both hairy and slimey. I saw a post criticizing the show for using all of its budget in the pilot, and I partially agree. Some of the frames look rushed or ugly. The more horrifying animations are nicely detailed though.

The music is still a strong point for me. The show's composer, Colin Stetson, is a multireedist. He has an uncanny ability to create hauntingly beautiful otherworldy noises. I first noticed him for his work on Hereditary.

I've included a vid of his performance during the Adult Swim Festival 2020. This is when I realized the insane sounds he produces come from just solo woodwind instruments. A one-man army of existential cosmic cacophony.

uzumakiep2

2024.10.11

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Started my morning with Trucido, a ripping grindcore band from Dallas, Texas.

I've added an about page and horror carousel, which is just a collage of my favorite spooky films.

I forgot to put onions on last night's pasta. πŸ§…

trucido

2024.10.10

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I watched Face Pulp (thrash hardcore punk) play at Twilight Bar, preceded by live wrestling and BLTs with cheesy fries. They are from Flagstaff and Ft. Defiance, Arizona.

Face Pulp at the Twilight Bar

2024.10.9

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Listening to Mind Palace, a local hardcore band. I shot them at the Snake Farm in Portland, Oregon. The person in the mask is mean-mugging.

Mind Palace at the Snake Farm in Portland
Mind Palace at the Snake Farm in Portland2

✞ END ✞



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